Welcome to Perspectives from WFSU Public Media I'm Tom Flanigan this program using the zoom platform pre-recorded on Tuesday March 30th for playback on Thursday April 1st not April fool's day it's a celebration of spring as it were the show is going to be aired on WFSU fm we're also going to archive it on WFSU .org so you can go back and listen to it as many times as you would like well back at the beginning of March we celebrated a women's history week actually we're marking it as a month-long observance and we talked with several local women who are pursuing careers in fields that for too many folks are probably still considered male only although that is changing thankfully now to bookend our observance our guests today are the latest group of trailblazers so designated by the oasis center for women and girls and this is the 13th group of outstanding individuals who have made groundbreaking contributions in Tallahassee and Leon County in multiple dimensions which we are going to get into there were a total now of 10 winners including Charlotte Stuart Tilly, Madeleine Pomariega, Dr. Tracy Thomas, Dr. Judy Mandrell and a posthumous trailblazer award to the late great Anita Davis who we all miss so fantastically right now but five of this year's trailblazers have joined us on Perspectives today and we're going to meet them find out a little bit more about their contributions to our community and we'll see where the conversation goes from there we say hi first right next door Gabrielle Gabrielli business management consultant uh certified scuba instructor animal rescuer and all around fantastic person Gabrielle it is so good to see you and thanks for joining us on our chat today thank you for having me we also say hi to an old friend Karen Moore founder and CEO of the more agency and author world traveler and let's see there's a whole bunch of others that I'm missing here but we can get into that as we go hi Karen hello Tom it is so great to see you we are also joined by Haniah Edwards now she has been exemplifying the phrase girls can do anything even as a student at sable palm elementary school and that's going back a lot of years Haniah thanks for joining us today and congratulations on the trailblazer thank you so much I'm glad we're so glad you could join us too here's a lady I haven't seen for a while Glenda Thornton and in full disclosure we used to be colleagues at the telephone company 10 000 years ago here uh now assistant dean for strategic initiatives at the Florida State University College of Law Glenda you haven't changed a bit you look great you do too Tom you look great on the radio that's the wonderful thing about this particular medium Glenda we all look just fantastic Kristel Avilus joins us community connector entrepreneur a whole bunch of other things Kristel I can't wait to catch up on your story here and thanks for joining us here on Perspectives today oh thank you Tom nice to be here and of course it would not be a party without Kelly Otte founder of the oasis center for women and girls recent candidate for Leon County commission a whole host of other things and Kelly you're just fantastic thank you so much for assembling this great group of trailblazers tell us about the program and how the oasis center for women and girls decided not just in the provision of services to those aforementioned women and girls but also making sure there was celebration in the community for outstanding contributions therein where did that come from um well first of all thanks for having me and for doing this I think it's an important conversation and I'm thrilled to be on the radio with uh these incredible women and you uh the oasis center from the very beginning was seen as a center that didn't just look at um services that filled gaps for women in needs but also promoted the extraordinary things that women were doing our philosophy and everything we do is really grounded in a social change mission which is to create equity for women across the board and that means that sometimes we have to remind people of what women have already accomplished and what what we're already capable of doing and so it was always an imperative part of what we did the very first one we incorporated oasis in 2007 and the first trailblazers event was in 2008 so it was definitely right up there with the um beginning parts of the organization well let's go around the uh the horn as it were the zoom horn and talk to uh this year's winners five of the ten here and Gabrielle Gabrielli let's start with you what was to your way of thinking now not the selection committee and not Kelly otte but to your way of thinking what do you consider the major contribution that you have made to this area and the low the many years that you have been here in the Tallahassee and Leon County area to me that's a tough question I not sure that I belong in this group of incredibly accomplished women um I was blown away when I heard the news and i've just always tried to lift people up um I have a passion in my heart for people who have challenges having overcome many myself and I think that you know for me being able to do things that women haven't always been able to do is something that I love and so I from an early age was told that I could do anything I set my mind to and gender didn't matter and so I was one of the first people in the Tallahassee area to um to be in video production as a woman owning a video production company and and then when it came to scuba diving I saw a need with my non-profit I saw a need for helping people with disabilities there were no instructors certified in Tallahassee male or female who had these specialized certifications to work with people with different needs and so I did that and it's been incredibly rewarding and just amazing well there's a lot more amazement to come here and uh we'll circle back around and talk a little bit more about some of the things that you have done some of the experiences that you've had and the inspiration that you provide to a lot of folks on a day-to-day basis but over to you Karen Moore um again back to the those halcyon days at Lake Ella in that little stone cottage where you started that uh embryonic agency for marketing and consulting when it came to uh getting messages out and uh you have kind of taken that far but in addition to the more agency and what you do there what other things are kind of like in your top five boy these are the things that really get me excited and enthused and get other people involved in that kind of enthusiasm well that's a great question Tom you know what first of all I need to congratulate Kelly Otte and the original leaders of the oasis center for having the vision to recognize that this was a needed resource in our community Tom you mentioned when I first started 29 years ago at one room in one cottage at Lake Ella and to have seen a community that says whoever you are we want to support you we want to help your business grow we want to recognize that young people can be leaders if they're encouraged and told not to think about the barriers but to think about the opportunities and so for me what gets me excited is the number of new businesses that are being created by young women and men you know I love to tell the story of when I started out 29 years ago I did not know one other woman CEO that had to deal with workers call up her 401 case now I'm sure they were there I just didn't know them and so to now see organizations that are embracing startup businesses embracing innovation in this community and to have women such as those that were honored by oasis to be mentors I think that that is the greatest need right now for young people especially young women they need somebody to extend their hand and say I'm not going to do it for you but I'm going to give you my best advice and allow you to fly and i'll be there to catch you if you fall and help you get back up again and so as I look around this community that's what I'm so excited about I'm excited that Tallahassee is a place that wants entrepreneurs especially young women considering becoming an entrepreneur to know this is a good place to start as we look on the screen right below you as one of those young entrepreneurs Kristel Avilus you you have started your own enterprise your own business you have aspirations and high hopes for that talk about that business and kind of what led you to found that in an era when making that kind of jump can be a very scary thing to do yes um definitely so um you know I opened my husband and I opened the first black owned transportation company here in town 17 years ago and we got a lot of pushback and it was a definitely a fight and definitely keeping going but also staying true to my calling of social work and you know still being able to do both so I went back to school why while having the business and we started with one car and ended up with 22 so um it's definitely has been a struggle but definitely very um rewarding to show my girls you know I'm mom of six so to show my girls that you can do anything and and even when obstacles face you that you just face them back so that is that is true to my mission and true to what I believe that you know just like miss Karen said you can do anything if you just push your hand out to help someone else but also get the help that you are receiving from someone as well and and knowing where to find that help which seems to be the key of operating in this community there are so many resources available but where the heck are they and how do you connect with them that is a big question it is it is I think that was the hardest part for me is I kind of stayed in my little shell but I realized that you know people needed me for help and I needed other people for help so that is still something I'm working on but getting out there networking and you know just staying true to your passion and your mission I think that would never fail you well one thing also you can't be afraid of is to reinvent yourself even if your life seems to be on one specific trajectory and you've done really well there at some point you suddenly realize we we gotta go in another direction which can be terrifying Glenda Thornton that is kind of the story of your life I remember back when you were with the old centel and what you are doing now at the FSU College of Law although there are lots of interconnected skill sets that I know you still use this is a very different thing for you how did this happen well it happened by um just being in the right place at the right time uh taking advantage of those connections um I actually received the trailblazer award in 2010 so a few years ago and was fortunate this year to chair the committee uh for trailblazers but um after my legal career I i was ready to retire and and sort of did retire for a couple of years and then uh just through happenstance I was um communicating with the dean here which in you know FSU is my alma mater I was a student here many years ago in the 80s and just had an opportunity to come back uh to the law school this time as an assistant dean and also as as a professor and I grabbed it and I think that's something that that oasis helps people realize that you're not always alone you know a lot of times you step out on faith and you think that's all you have but you have these incredible women I look at Karen Moore and I think about when I when I re was a trailblazer in 2010 in in large part it was because I had just completed my service as the um first African-American to chair the Tallahassee chamber of commerce in its then 85-year history but I did that following in Karen's footsteps and other mentors footsteps who who were there for me and and helping me she may not remember this but I remember as a young person just coming onto the chamber board she was chairman of the board and and one of my greatest honors was when she bestowed on me the chairman's award for the work I did that year and I think that exemplifies what women in this community do very well is we don't just look at all the women and say yeah good for her we lift each other up and hopefully it's the continual chain that that reaches down to to younger people like Haniah and and others and lets them know that hey it may seem like you're out here on your own you're changing course with your career and it may seem scary but you're not alone someone's here and in our case and I'm happy to be a part of oasis to to uh be part of that that group well Glenda you brought up a good point that is a beautiful segue down to you Haniah Edwards knowing your mom as as we do and a lady who is never shy about being involved in the community and setting an example for young people when you got the award here the uh the award from oasis this this go around what was the reaction of we we know all these guys who just talked but what was the reaction of the folks who you go to school with were they excited where were they whoa way to go Haniah we love you or was it just sort of like what how did that happen oh well school nobody knew at school actually um yeah I didn't even know because most of the stuff my mom like most of the um the oasis center I went there when I was younger so they have my mom contact information not mine and my mom tends to leave her emails unread so I didn't know for the longest time until she sent me the screenshot of the flyer and it was like it was like girls can do anything and I saw my name and I was like is that me it's like and so yeah nobody at school knew until um on my instagram I had posted the the nominees and I posted my name but I don't think nobody it really like registered anybody's mind until I posted my award and then everybody was like oh my god congratulations and then I was in the Tallahassee democrat and everybody was like oh my god like what happened but yeah and I was excited too so we were matching each other's energy do any folks come up to you though and say okay that was really awesome that was great but how did you do that and do you think I could do that too no no well my sisters my sisters actually asked me how I did it but nobody really at school but my sisters are very fascinated about how I got this big reward and they loved it and they wanted one too so maybe we can pass it along that way we start with the family work our way out that sounds like you Kristel that's kind of like what you're doing with the kids right now but Kellyottethat brings us full circle to you then again how do you get more Haniah Edwards primed and ready to go to get into these positions of responsibility and and real power and authority in this community you know something I just had an interesting reaction to listening to Haniah I was thinking back on my raising my daughter and I used to take her to places when people were giving me awards or I was speaking at different places anything where I was taking the stage I had visibility and I didn't make a big deal out of it I just made sure she was there because what I wanted her to do was just absorb the opportunity and the information that it was possible for her that's really all I wanted and I think that really that speaks to the generational change it's like when uh Glenda was just talking about Karen being uh the chairman of the chamber of commerce board and then turning around and sort of recognizing and pulling her up that's really all we're trying to do with the with changing the condition of women's lives is to is to sort of auTomatically have women and girls perceive that they can do anything they want to do without ever really telling them they can't and I think generationally that's changing because of the work we're all doing because when I was a kid I was told all that I could not do I was also really I was really steered towards the things that I was expected to do get married have children be a secretary I was really steered in that way and all we've really done is changed that um one of the things that I do want to make a comment on though because I have to say this out loud in front of Karen is when somebody nominated Karen this year I actually almost took it out of the pile because I just auTomatically assumed that she had been a trailblazer 13 years ago and I had to go back and look through every single award to believe that we had not acknowledged her the very first year and it was just circumstances of who nominated who but that was a big fail on her part she should have been um in the very first group of award winners that we did so I just want to say that I think um the trail there there are trailblazers that sort of set the path and and put women into positions that they've never been in before and then there are trailblazers that grab a hold of women and drag them with them and there's a big difference and we recognize the difference as women we know who they are and Karen is one that grabbed women and dragged them with her down the path and I think that that's worth recognizing it's really really an incredible gift to give to the future generations of girls and women who weren't sure that they could do more y'all got that could do more what is delightful and and touching comment thank you so much but receiving a trailblazer award whether you're 11 years old or you're 110 years old it's important because it sends a statement the statement is that you if you're successful you have you almost have a mandate there's an expectation that you help the next generation and if you're not doing that then shame on you and we are fortunate in this town by you being able to say we're now on year 13 plus and we have so many women that we can recognize because they are doing that for the next generation you know what else is really interesting is this month I just wrote a closing column about this month this is the first month where I think it's gotten a little eye and like there are too many women crammed into the month of March and what's interesting to me about that is it's a way to measure change because that isn't the way it was that's why we started it because nobody else was doing it now lots of people are recognizing women in March and what I say is that we have now expanded beyond the bounds of the calendar that it really just needs to be an everyday reality for people in this community that we need to make sure that we're honoring and recognizing that it takes more for women to get to where they are for Kristel to get to where she is than it takes for some other people and that we need to acknowledge that that it's a greater stride and so I think it's an everyday thing I think we need to make women's history month women's history year you brought up a good point Kelly two in that it has not been that long when the world was a very very different place just two generations ago which is when my wife betty and I moved to Tallahassee there were and there's nothing wrong with old white guys being real but there were nothing but white guys on the city and the county commission and the school board with the exception of James Ford who was on the Tallahassee city commission and I looked at that body and I thought there is a black gentleman on the city council here how incredibly awesome and progressive is the city of Tallahassee because i'd never i'd never seen anything like that and suddenly you have women coming onto those bodies you have Carol Bellamy and you have uh Betty Harley and you have Anita Davis and you have all these other people who and now it is I mean this is the way that it is and we have this gender and racial diversity that we take for granted but still when it comes down to the actual seats of power in this community more can be done and Gabrielle Gabrielli i'd like you to address that talk about how we kind of even that out as well and get more participation of everyone into that inner sanctum well I am not a person involved in politics in any way I kind of try to dismiss myself from it but I can tell you from an outsider looking in and someone who personally knows the candidates as friends often I i just think it's really important for women to lift up other women looking at some of the campaigns that happen some of them got very heated and a couple of women especially I think were battered in the in their campaigns and I didn't I didn't like that at all and so I think it's important whether it's in politics or anything else that we lift each other up and that we focus on what somebody can do rather than whatever their past was or whatever held them back you know at times in their lives I think it's so important for women to lift up other women and to get rid of those negative messages that are being sent by women um and men toward women um that we replace it with positive so i've always been the kind of person that likes to speak up when I see somebody being picked on especially women especially girls and I think that it's important to have those voices and raise our own voices for people who may not have the opportunity to raise their voices and stop that kind of negativity Tom if I if I can add to that um as a board member of oasis I know one way we can help address that is we have a program at oasis called women can run where we actually provide it's a non-partisan campaign training program we do workshops we have debates um we do whatever we can to help women who are interested in in putting their throwing their head in their in the in the ring uh helping them get ready to do that uh it's not something that I personally would ever want to do but but I admire people who who are interested in that so there are resources out there uh that can help help with that and oasis just happens to be one but beyond that even you have the cutthroat world of business Karen more you know that Tallahassee is just a seething hotbed of communications and marketing and lobbying firms and many of the same things that your agency is involved with and it can get really down and dirty out there how do you remain supportive of other women who you may be in direct competition to in the day-to-day work world well thank you for making that point someone recently shared with me that there were more marketing and pr firms headquartered in Tallahassee than there were in Orlando and Tampa combined so we are in a market that is clearly saturated with my industry I think I take a different approach my approach is my competitors aren't local my competitors are in New York and they're in California and they're in london or Dubai so I lift up everyone in my hometown because I want us all collectively to say the business is not just located in certain zipcode districts the business is global and let's focus global and when we do we get businesses that want to then locate back into our community because they see that we are a place where you can grow a business to me that's the number one key that a chamber or a board or oasis uh can provide that says Tallahassee is a place that not only do you want to raise your family but you want to start a business grow a business and you can be successful here because the community wants you to be successful and so what I hope is that people don't focus on one individual company and how they can beat that company or they're better than that company or bigger than that company I want to hear what you're doing to help our community and then let's share best practices on how to get business from outside our community construction of a win-win scenario which I understand from one of my favorite counselors here in town again a lady that women by and large and you don't want to make a sweeping statement here or generalize or stereotype but coming up with these sorts of okay I can have this and you can have that and we can work together and here's a network we can build and we all can benefit from that Kristel I see you nodding your head you're going hey I am there these are the kinds of things that make my business better and other people's business better and we can profit all together as a result of that is that kind of your philosophy yes I definitely think so I mean I'm big on I think it takes more effort to not speak to someone than to say hello so you know I i when we first started the company it was many people that went behind us and started their own company and I said hey I would have helped you you know because we need more like us so what you didn't have to sneak we could I could have gave you some contracts some connections so I think it's just so much easier it's enough you know I'm gonna say the only way I know how it's no food out here for everyone and I want to be the one that helps bring you to the table of the food don't ever think that I'm trying to you know keep the table away from you you we all need to progress and move and that is my philosophy I'm always willing to help someone even when I'm interviewing people and I say hey this may not be the position right now but keep my number keep you know keep in contact if you have a question that you're embarrassed to ask or you want the answer to or you want to know how to go through this process I'm definitely your girl that will help you all right Haniah Edwards how do you see your life playing out here uh you're you're in school now and how's it going by the way I know it's rough for a lot of kids well actually school is going really good for me right now and I was actually kind of um worried because this is my first year in high school and I'm in the records ib program while I'm in the pre ib program right now and I didn't know how how much work it was going to be and how it was going to be changed my covet but I'm doing really really good in school right now and um there you go and you said you want to know how I planned yeah I just said it's impossible to you know yeah to look ahead at this point I had no clue when I was your age what the heck I was gonna have for dinner you know or who I was gonna see after school or whatever uh I could not look ahead more than like 15 or 20 minutes but as far ahead as you could look how do you see things going for you well I actually like having plans so I actually do have a plan and so I plan to do the roll and um so I want two tools and only stay there for two years and then I'm gonna go to matt house I mean to Morehouse Med School and I plan to and then whatever hospital they send me to for my residency I want to become a neurosurgeon here good on you oh and mMrehouse is such a phenomenal institution yay ah that is that that is and neurosurgery that is that is just beyond beyond wonderful so Kelly Otte I don't know it looks like Haniah is setting a pretty high bar here even in advance of of that future that looks like it's already so bright it's about behind you here I think her mom is going to be uh the first well now I would be the second black woman mayor because the first was john emman johnson and then I think Haniah is going to be president of the United States that's what I thought when I met her for the very first time over a kickball game and I was pretty pretty blown away by her just sort of ability to command a space like I was just that was just really delightful for me and I have this weird way that I look at women's sort of evolution which is I have I have this sort of impatient patience where I uh recognize that it takes a lot of time to change things and sometimes it's generationally you often have to look backwards in order to be able to see if you've made any gains at all and so I have that kind of patience but I'm also impatient so even when when you were talking and and talking about the evolution of women serving on local elected bodies I was thinking you know but we've never had a female state attorney or a female sheriff as a matter of fact if a woman runs for those positions that's all people see is that it's a woman running for this position rather than a fair and equal sort of competition there seems to be some sort of cap on the number of women that are allowed to run for local office um I i think evolution for me will be when we have seven female county commissioners and that isn't the front page news that people are just as okay with seeing that as they're seeing seven men sitting on the body um I think one of the things that I really want men to think about is why women and people of color are always having to acknowledge who was the first when they really don't because it doesn't happen that often anymore it doesn't happen very often anymore that a white man is the first one to do something and so I have this sort of impatience patience and Haniah it allows me to remain patient and in the moment for things because I can see the change in everything that's happened every time she talks every time I'm around her every time I hear what she's done and other spectacular girls we had another girl can do anything award winner it was Charlotte Stewart Tilly who by the time she was 13 organized a protest at the capitol where over 400 people came like at 13 I couldn't even you know I was trying to figure out what chores I was supposed to get done that day like that was it so impatient patience yes and I know miss Stewart Tilly well she came over to the station this was right after Greta Thunberg became a thing and this young lady comes in and says you know I am modeling my life after her except I think I'm gonna do her one or two better and by gosh you know I you sometimes feel yourself react a certain way when you perceive that you were in the presence of greatness yeah you know even if it's not there yet you know it's going to come and that was the same way with this young lady and you got to say the same thing about the uh the the current makeup of our conversational panel here on this Perspectives as well but Gabrielle in reaction to something that Kelly just said is it a case do you think sometimes of one step forward and two steps back you see some pushback even now in these enlightened times that we're talking about of when perhaps folks with a more traditional view if I can say that with some degree of delicacy just mightily keep pushing back on the fact that there are women who aspire to authority and power and influence and these other facets of our society that some folks still think they have no business being involved in how do you deal with that I think again we have to lift each other up and I actually don't think that it's just limited limited to women and people of color I think people with differences including disabilities are often overlooked or questioned when they seek higher opportunities and for me I'm passionate about making sure that everybody has the same opportunities regardless of any differences people who are transgender people who are just different are for some reason have to prove you know two or three times over including women that that we're capable that we can do it and so my entire life I just remember kind of pushing up pushing myself to try to show that I was capable unlike Haniah who just blows me away I was very insecure as a child I think that having a strong support system of other people um including women is key and Haniah obviously has an incredibly powerful and beautiful mom who's out there in the community doing all kinds of things Kelly you know exposing your daughter to those kinds of opportunities without saying you're gonna be here someday you're putting the pressure on her that's a beautiful thing nobody ever expected anything of me it's I i had a strange kind of upbringing where I was never told that I should go to college I was never told that um that I you know was going to do great things I was just set I was told you're you're a girl and you can do anything you want to do don't let anyone say otherwise but when I said I was going to college my family was kind of surprised I came from a broken home I was a little sister and big brothers big sisters I had a lot of struggles with poverty homelessness and you know it it was not an easy life and so for me I just think that if everybody can lift up others who are seemingly different whether it's gender or disability or whatever it is people are calling out that difference if we can just show that it's actually a great thing to have these differences then the world will be a better place and I love our community I think you know we have had a lot of firsts here including with women in positions of power but I agree that we need more in the legal system we need more in systems that have traditionally held people back who are different and so that's my perspective on it Tom if I could add an additional thought you know one of the things that I admire both about Gabrielle and Kristel is that they are leaders not necessarily just women leaders but they are leaders because they saw a niche that wasn't being filled and they said let us fill that mint and that's one of things I hope that young women see there's an opportunity and I'm good enough smart enough talented enough to go leverage that opportunity and take advantage of it those two women both saw an opportunity and didn't allow any naysayer or any preconceived notion that they were capable of doing it and so I hope all the the elementary school children out there can say you know what if there's something that should be done and I'm passionate about it I can go do it there's not a challenge in front of me saying I can't passing it on is key in this entire discussion that we're having and so in the few minutes that we have remaining here and this this hour has just flown by incredibly I want to get from each of you just a a quick hit on who you consider the person who has put your life in a in a positive place or in a upward trajectory most definitely Haniah let me start with you who you consider I mean mom probably but you know either mom or someone else who you can look at and say boy this person really got me going in the in the right direction and I owe a lot to them say I would say my mom like my mom has done so much for me most of the things that I am in she puts me in now most of the time I don't know about it but she gives me and she provides much of the opportunities that I that are placed for me because she's such a big part of the community and so she has so many connections so when she sees him as she know because she knows what track I want to take so when she sees something that she think will be good for me she just she just signs me up for it so that has given me which is giving me the opportunity to for other people to see me so I'm on other people's radar because she tells me I mean she tells them about me which so then when they when something comes up they'll be like oh yeah Talethia's daughter can do this so I would say it's a lot of people but my mom is like the top person who she's always just been there yeah your mom is a promotional firm on the same level as I would say the more agency or you know something like that yeah your mom is just unbelievably awesome Glenda Thornton a major person in your life talk about that well I'm going to take a cue from from the great Haniah because uh for me it's my mom also uh for for similar reasons but different she was she didn't have nearly the opportunities I i've had growing up uh poor in in south alabama um but she exposed me to so much that and she did it in part because she didn't have the opportunity but one thing she always told me when I when I became involved in things in school or whatever was if you're gonna do this you do it well and and don't give up don't quit and sometimes I was like oh god i've got to still do this and but but that's that's ingrained in me now and I think that's part of of the whole sense that it doesn't matter what you look like or where you come from if you're going to do something then then do your best and and don't give up so so for me thank you Haniah for for leading it off because uh for me it's my mom too and and and you hang in there your mom is incredible I'm a big fan of your mom and and so are a lot of people so so you've got the right role model there that's great Glenda thank you Kristel who's who's your fave so um her mom when she hears this is going to be shot but it's actually my grandmother so my grandmother is um a born activist um and she is actually who inspired me to go back to TCC and my business was doing really well at the time and she said nobody can take education away from you go get your education I said I'm gonna go get the paper so you can put on your kitchen kitchen table and you know that took me to where I am today being licensed now so you know and as as miss Glenda said she wasn't you know growing up in Jamaica she was one of 16. she wasn't the cards that and the opportunities that I have and now I did have some some obstacles like many of the women on here but I would definitely have to say my grandmother she instilled a lot of the principles and values I have with me today so it'll remind me mimi Karen Moore your turn well certainly my parents uh never put any boundaries around me said to to do exactly what I wanted to do but I'm going to say my husband he's a man who has said yes you can do anything you want and then our partnership marriage if you feel like this is a challenge you want to take on i'll support you 100 so when I left a very good nice job at FSU to go out on my own with no clients no money and no no direction he stood by me 100 and it's so much fun to see you guys on on facebook traveling the world and doing so many fun things together you're like teenagers so there Gabrielle Gabrielli who you got you know I absolutely I love my mother my mom came from difficult circumstances in Scotland but I have to say my dad has been the biggest inspiration for me my dad uh I say was the first feminist I ever knew and so you know back in the day when he was in the air force he was promoting women in engineering long before other people were and he wasn't just promoting them he was mentoring he was grooming them for success and when they uh did better than he did in his career when they excelled beyond him he was happy for them and I always saw him as a role model as a leader and uh he told me my whole life uh go for it anytime I was always the conservative one like I don't know if I should do this he's like just go for it and I'm like okay you know even as recently as three years ago I was thinking I had to replace my my old car that had 200 drive cars to the wheels fall off it had 202 000 miles on it a ford escape hybrid and I needed to replace it by the way I donated that hybrid to WFSU but um but so I i test drove my dream car and I said no I'm gonna wait till the car after this before because it's way out of my budget my dad said go for it three years ago to the day I bought a Tesla which is my dream car and you know every time I drive it I think you know my dad is really responsible for that and I have no regrets whatsoever when I bought my office building same thing I'm like dad I don't know this is a little more than I think I want to spend like I never thought I would own an office building I bought my leadership development center he was like go for it okay Gabrielle go for it all right I did I went for it and you know what every time he's given me that advice it's been absolutely spot on so I just really am grateful for my dad always encouraging me what is that old saying behind every magnificent phenomenal woman is a very proud supportive guy right how about you Kelly Otte I think it was the other way I think behind every successful man was a woman back there getting him to do the right thing so I uh my mother saved my life which i've just recently told her story so it'll be in the Tahoe women's magazine this next month but and my husband has always been rock solid 37 years he's never once suggested that I couldn't do anything I wanted to but honestly I had a mentor my very my second domestic violence center woman by the name of Dr. Alice Twining who one day said to me honey you know you could make a living doing this work and I said what she said you could make a living in this work changing the world and that literally changed the entire direction of my life because I thought I was going to be a secretary and that I would do volunteer work on the weekend and she said nope you can change the world and get paid to do it and so that is what I have done for the last 30 years is work to change the world but at the same time make sure my family is okay and support my family so yeah i've been very very well boy and that is something again we didn't even have an opportunity to get into but the additional pressures and responsibilities and stuff that women have to do in contrast to so many men who can just take off and focus on one thing to unfortunately the exclusion of a lot more things in the course of their life folks it has been such a wonderful conversation and congratulations to the entire troop of of trailblazers in this particular uh iteration the 13th annual to Gabrielle Gabrielli, Karen Moore, Haniah Edwards and I am going to need a neurologist real soon you hurry up go to Morehouse get that degree get that certification I'll be calling you and make an appointment as soon as you're out of there young lady don't you forget it Glenda Thornton so good to see you again, Kristel Avilus and Kelly Otte Of course thank you for being part of fascinating Perspectives and once again uh the proving of the statement that women can do absolutely everything and anything and thank you all for being part of the conversation today on Perspectives brought to you by the way uh by WFSU Public Media in Tallahassee which produces the same taylor cox behind the scenes pushing the buttons today Paul Dam, Amy Diaz de Villegas, Brandon Brown, Trisha Moynihan and Lydell Rawls also in the back shop our director of content Kim Kelling, executive producer and I'm Tom Flanigan next week's program still a work in progress we're getting some things nailed down but we invite you to join us right here on Perspectives next week from WFSU Public Media take care