VOICEOVER (VO): The nation's favorite antiques experts, £200 each and one big challenge.

Cuz I'm going to declare war.

Why?

VO: Who can make the most money buying and selling antiques as they scour the UK?

Can you make it...?

No.

VO: The aim is to trade up and hope each antique turns a profit.

Ouch!

VO: But it's not as easy as you might think - and things don't always go to plan.

Push!

VO: So will they race off with a huge profit, or come to a grinding halt?

We're doomed!

We're doomed!

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip!

VO: Sadly, it's the last antiques voyage for this week's competitive experts, but they're putting a brave face on it.

THOMAS: The sun is out, to say hello!

PAUL: Laidlaw feels better already.

VO: Thomas Plant.

He's a valuer, he's an auctioneer, and he's an eternal ditherer.

Just thinking in my head.

VO: But what he lacks in speed, he makes up for with his own peculiar charm.

Let's hope that there's lots of beautiful antiques, like our beautiful reception.

VO: Oh, lord.

Here's Paul Laidlaw.

He's an auctioneer, he's a tactician and he's all business - by any means necessary.

Hand over your money, sir.

VO: It's been a roller coaster of emotion this week, and our savvy Scot had a wobbly start.

Oh, Paul.

PAUL: I'm gonna cry.

VO: But he's played a clever game and is now racing out in front with a very healthy £360.68.

Read it and weep, Plant!

VO: Thomas, bless him, started so well, at one point nearly doubling his money.

I just feel... oh!

VO: But sadly he's been on a downward spiral, leaving him chasing his tail with £208.54.

Can you lend me some money?

VO: That's a meagre £8.54 profit since he started this trip four days ago.

VO: It's the final furlong as our boys zip merrily along in their rather classy Alfa Romeo Spider.

Thomas may have lost plenty of money, but he's not losing his head... THOMAS: Oh, yes.

VO: ..just his hat.

THOMAS: Oh, my hat's gone!

VO: This week's route has taken out experts from Skipton, through the glorious English countryside to their final destination in Wiltshire.

VO: On today's final leg they're leaving Watlington behind them and heading for the final auction in Pewsey.

First stop is the beautiful village of Tetsworth.

VO: In 1589, Tetsworth was sold by the Crown to the Petty family until inherited and lost in 1674 by the last Christopher Petty - described as man of "unthriftiness, folly and extravagance".

And with that in mind, here come our Thomas and Paul.

THOMAS: Anyway... PAUL: Great!

I've been here before.

Oh, my word, right.

So I've got a bit of a head start, because I know all about this place.

Yeah, but do you know anything about antiques?

Well, from recent experience, the answer is no!

VO: The Swan is a classy establishment with many a price tag to cause our boys consternation, especially poor Thomas.

Hello.

THOMAS: Hello, good morning.

PHILIPPA: Morning.

VO: Luckily, lovely Philippa's on hand to help to give them... well, kind words at least.

VO: Chaps, it's time to divide and conquer, but who gets which side of the shop?

THOMAS: You're more of a Queen Anne man, aren't you?

You're more of a queen than I am!

Why don't you go down the Queen Anne?

VO: For goodness sake, will you girls just get on with it!

This is the first room I've walked into, all very nice, but there is no mileage in this room, and you know what I mean.

VO: Not really, Paul.

But if you're moaning about the prices, be glad you don't have Thomas's lightened purse.

THOMAS: Chinese Armorial style bowl, Sampson.

Hm, not at 140, no.

VO: Come on, Thomas - money isn't everything!

Well, unless you're buying antiques, that is.

I think I will be more of a gambler at the beginning of this exercise than I will be today.

I don't want to blow it all so close to the final hurdle.

VO: Oh, come on Paul, live a little!

Go all-in!

THOMAS: Wait round the corner and attack him.

Rob him for his money.

VO: Thomas, none of your tactics have worked so far, give it a go - but mind you don't take somebody's eye out!

I may have found it.

I adore vintage spectacles.

Oh, I don't know what it is that appeals, it's partly the former science student in me that is drawn to them as instruments - this is technology, optics.

Partly, aren't they so evocative of a time, could you see, I don't know, Dr Johnson wearing such spectacles?

PAUL: They're not gonna set the world alight, but pricetag, £15.

I think that's a no brainer.

VO: Paul, if it's a "no brainer" then maybe you've found your level.

They're really rather sweet - but are you losing your focus?

PAUL: I need to try these on, but with my melon sized head, that's not advisable, but look at the charm, absolutely evocative.

Pretty original case.

Consider them sold.

Easy as that.

Yeah, lovely.

Thank you very much.

VO: Paul, sorry but, you completely forgot to haggle there!

And you're a Sco... A scholar at haggling... normally.

Now, what's the matter with Thomas?

Piles?

I'm... No point me looking at anything here, I've only got £200.

VO: Moan, moan, moan.

This is your last hurrah - now pull yourself together, man!

Thomas Plant.

You are come lightly laden there.

No investments made, but it's a wonderful place.

What?

It's just a little bit rich for me.

That's cool, but I'm on a mission.

THOMAS: Well, I know you are.

PAUL: I think vamoose, yeah?

Vamoose, yeah, definitely.

VO: Well at least someone is grabbing their last trip by the horns - so let's get this antiques rodeo back on the road-eo.

VO: Thomas and Paul leave Tetsworth in the dust and push on 40 miles west to the market town of Lechlade.

VO: Lechlade sits on almost the highest point of the River Thames in Gloucestershire.

It's popular for leisurely river rides, but our experts have no time for such luxuries, oh no.

Hello there.

MANDY: Afternoon.

Hi, I'm Paul.

Hello Paul, I'm Mandy.

VO: Paul's found his way to Jubilee Hall Antiques and seems to be in a serious buying mood today.

PAUL: I'm feeling the pressure.

I've got the money, I've got the budget, but have they got a little gem hidden in there?

VO: Less talk and more action, Paul, please - the final auction is beckoning.

PAUL: Pleasing little early 19th century pocket snuff box there, lacquered papier mâché.

PAUL: Looks like fishing with nets hanging out to dry, £35 ticket price, I think that's a lovely little object for that.

PAUL: It's just, if I may, that little mâché snuff box there, a little look at that.

Well, I needn't look very long and hard at that, because it is what it is.

PAUL: But the obvious next question is, could you see for me what... the bottom line could be on that?

Well, you seem like a nice young man.

Nicer than some, so... How about £30?

VO: Oh Mandy, you clearly don't know Paul that well!

This is where the nice young man thing turns.. MANDY: Oh, not so nice!

PAUL: ..into a hideous monster.

I'd like to pay £20 for that is what I'd like to pay.

MANDY: I can't, sorry.

MANDY: I went straight in at my bottom line for, at 30.

I could've gone higher and negotiated down.

Indeed, indeed, indeed.

Squeeze some more out of that.

£25... 29.

Another pound, just to be friendly.

Right, my last push, and don't mind me asking.

I will buy it, make it £28 and I will buy it.

I can't.

VO: Wow, Mandy is really standing her ground, but surely Paul can squeeze just a little more?

Oh!

Oh.

You're good!

PAUL: Look at £28.

MANDY: I can't.

PAUL: 29's a rubbish number.

MANDY: Seriously, I can't.

You know I'm gonna buy it, I'm not gonna be silly.

PAUL: Thank you very much... MANDY: Thank you.

..for squeezing it as hard as you could.

VO: Well done Mandy for standing strong, girl.

She's only small.

VO: Now, looking for inner strength, Thomas has given himself an inspiration break - well, get in!

VO: This is Tristan, site manager of Kelmscott Manor, formerly the summer home of world famous 19th century designer William Morris.

Morris felt the architecture and design of his time weren't to his taste, so along with friend Phillip Webb, he created his own handcrafted designs.

THOMAS: The hallowed territory, this has probably been 20 years in the waiting for me.

TRISTAN: You've just realized what we've come in... THOMAS: Is this what I think it is?

I think it is what you think it is.

OK, so this is Phillip Webb, isn't it?

Phillip Webb was Morris' mate.

They met as architects, that's right.

He designed this for the Red House, did he?

He designed that for the Red House.

Red House was the first house Morris designed with Webb.

THOMAS: Was the Red House for Morris?

TRISTAN: It was for Morris.

THOMAS: Morris and Jane.

TRISTAN: And Jane, as their first marriage home.

So they built this house together, but there was nothing to fill it with.

What they saw out there, say on the high street, so to speak, didn't satisfy their demands.

Absolutely.

So they asked their good friend, Phillip, to design them some furniture.

THOMAS: But design it so it's craftsman built.

And that's the whole thing, isn't it?

It's changed the world.

TRISTAN: Absolutely That's the important thing.

And significant then of course because with some of these significant pieces for Red House, they then thought 'must be others who may like it'.

VO: In 1861, Morris - along with some friends - created the firm Morris, Marshall & Faulkner, later Morris & Co. William Morris' work is still loved and admired the world over.

Particularly his most extraordinary talent as a pattern designer.

TRISTAN: Here we have, as you probably recognize, strawberry thief.

THOMAS: The strawberry thief.

THOMAS: Tell me the story behind the strawberry thief.

TRISTAN: Ah, well it is said that on one occasion, he was waiting his turn to use the three seater privy, which you can still go and visit at the end of the back yard!

And surrounded by the wild strawberry plants, which are still there.

And down came a thrush and pinched a strawberry and flew off, and he was apparently inspired then to go off and do the pattern for strawberry thief.

VO: It just shows you can get inspiration from the most unusual places at the most... awkward times.

VO: "The Strawberry Thief" is still produced and loved today, available from your local, highly-expensive interior design shoppe.

TRISTAN: But I have a treat for you.

THOMAS: Oh really?

Wow.

So what's this?

This is original fabric.

The colors are so strong, aren't they?

THOMAS: It's such a groundbreaking pattern.

Very lucky to see that, absolutely tremendous.

VO: Kelmscott Manor and its beautiful gardens remained an essential retreat and source of inspiration for Morris for the rest of his life.

Let's hope it's inspired our poor Thomas to get out there and get searching for those beautifully designed antique gems.

VO: Down the road there's no stopping Paul Laidlaw.

He's a man on a mission, making his mark down at Lechlade Antiques Arcade.

Quite a contrast to the previous center, this is.

PAUL: There's a lot of bric-a-brac, modern collectables, retro material here.

But that's not to say that this couldn't yield a little hidden treasure.

Keep looking.

Have we done upstairs, is the question.

No.

VO: There's got to be some hidden treasures here, Paul.

You just need to smoke them out.

VO: What's this then?

VO: Asking for £38?

PAUL: Just a mad little object, so what is it?

Victorian, I mean high Victorian, OTT, we've got this cast gilt metal brass claw holding this agate egg.

What is it?

It's essentially a pipe, but a cigarette would be held the bowl, rather than tobacco.

You can just about see Aleister Crowley with that, can't you?

You certainly could.

Or Sherlock Holmes, I was thinking even.

I mean, I think it was more his thing.

But it's a million miles off the mark, I mean I'd need that for a tiny fraction of that.

PAUL: I'll tell you what I want to pay for that.

I'll take a punt at 15.

And I am pretty damn sure, I can look you in the eye, I'll get £20-30 for that.

DEALER: 15 quid, we'll let it go 15 quid.

PAUL: You cool with that, it's a quirky wee thing, we'll just give it a punt, my man.

We'll give it a punt.

Been a pleasure.

Just for a laugh.

Yeah, absolutely, thanks very much.

Well, let's do it, I'll give you some money.

VO: Another fantastic result Paul - you're on fire today.

VO: Unfortunately the same can't be said for your somewhat dithering competitor - who's bought sweet nothing so far.

Let's hope Thomas pulls his finger out tomorrow.

Night night.

VO: It's a new day, it's a new dawn and at least one of our chaps is feeling good.

VO: So far, Paul's spent £59 on three lots - A pair of Victorian spectacles, a Georgian lacquer snuff box and a Victorian novelty cigarette pipe.

He's got still got a huge £301.68 to burn.

VO: Thomas, meanwhile, hasn't spent a penny.

He's still got his £208.54 to burn.

That's only £8.54 more than he started with - oh, the shame!

VO: Today our boys are going their separate ways.

Thomas is stopping off in Hungerford while Paul is trying his luck 30 miles away in Basingstoke.

VO: Often mistaken for a new town, Basingstoke is an old market town, and has held a regular Wednesday market since 1214.

Unfortunately today's not market day, but it's Paul's last shot before the grand finale - hopefully owner Allan will help him bag a bargain.

PAUL: Allan, I genuinely do have a respectable budget, and I absolutely would be delighted to buy something in here.

VO: Paul, you've played a blinder so far, but as you know things can change in the blink of an eye in this game, so buy wisely and keep your wits about you.

PAUL: Always nice to find something that resonates with me from a Scots point of view.

PAUL: This is mid-19th century long case clock, particularly Scottish in its form, it's called a drum head.

You picture a grandfather clock, and you picture an upright hood and face, and a long slender trunk and plinth base, typically, but this one here with this drum head, and then this tapering trunk, it's not unique to Scotland, but it's particularly common, or relatively common.

VO: A very fine, handsome piece, Paul.

But it is £550, are you admiring it or, you know, just considering it?

Glasgow made clock, that specimen.

I don't know if it would prove to be a popular clock in today's environment, but there's no getting away from what it is, and it's as far from home as I am.

Clock has got to be 250 quid is the best you can get that.

VO: Come on, Paul, the clock is ticking - if you'll pardon the pun - but that does sounds like a pretty good deal!

PAUL: I'm a nervous wreck now, because Thomas Plant was in the same position as I am a wee while ago, way ahead of the game, feeling smug.

Stuck his neck out, and lost his head.

Ah, well, play safe then.

PAUL: Oh no!

No, because that's not my style, I want to buy a proper antique.

200 squids.

ALLAN: Hmm, mm, mm!

I know it's lean.

VO: Huh, £200!

You've got to admire his nerve!

Tell you what, you buy me a cup of coffee, and you can have a deal.

That's one down.

Cheers, my man.

VO: Hat's off, eh?

A fine, handsome item with a thoroughly healthy discount.

And there's no stopping Paul in Basingstoke today.

PAUL: No surprises, magic lantern.

PAUL: For those that don't know, it's a big slide projector.

PAUL: How old is it?

It's a Victorian specimen.

We should have, but it's lacking, a burner in here.

A naked flame burner, and we projected onto the wall and in the Victorian era when we can't pop down the cinema, because the Lumiere brothers haven't gone there yet, this is cracking home entertainment, isn't it?

Your magic lantern... Yeah, it's quite a nice piece.

VO: It is rather lovely indeed.

You have the eye today, Paul.

These magic lanterns were the high-tech must-have home-entertainment system of the Victorian era.

Now, I have got the box and some slides for you.

Oh, excellent.

They're up here.

PAUL: That might change everything.

ALLAN: It is the original box.

It's a bit tatty, which is why I didn't display it with it.

ALLAN: But there we are.

PAUL: Ah, a wee handful of... ALLAN: Some original Victorian slides.

PAUL: Oh, fair enough.

No slide carrier.

£50, £50.

PAUL: Which isnae bad.

ALLAN: It's not bad, that's a good price.

I'm against the clock.

Can we make it 40, shake, I give you some money, and I run.

Proper money?

Proper money.

Allan, a pleasure.

A pleasure.

VO: So Paul's now filled his swag bag with four items, and two of them are real crackers!

Thomas Plant, meanwhile, has still not parted with any cash.

Shocking, isn't it?

I feel so worried about losing it all, that I don't want to do that, but if something is there, which grabs me and is gonna cost a lot of money, I might as well just go for it, cuz I've got nothing to lose.

VO: And everything to gain!

Hungerford is on the River Dun in the Kennet Valley.

In 1688 Prince William of Orange met James II's commissioners, right here, to make plans for the throne of England to pass on to him.

VO: So there are deals to be done in this town, and Thomas might actually buy something!

That'd be a relief.

At least it's stopped raining, and there's enough blue sky to mend a man's shirt, so maybe my luck is turning.

VO: I really hope so Thomas, I really, really do!

Got bags of money to spend.

Bags of money.

Well, not bags, but some.

VO: Actually, you've still got the same £208.54 you had first thing yesterday morning.

So roll up your sleeves and get stuck into a cabinet or two.

There we go.

THOMAS: Oh, well done.

Actually, before we start, I saw this.

ELIZABETH: You like your glass, don't you?

I love my glass.

THOMAS: Look at that trumpet vase, that's by Pallme-Konig.

THOMAS: Pallme-Konig is Bohemian glass from the art nouveau period in the late 19th century, early 1900s.

That is a nice thing.

OK. VO: I like the sound of this.

Thomas Plant could, quite possibly, soon be back in business.

So what I have found here is a pair of silver plated posy vases.

They're £16.

One's got a chip to the glass, which is quite severe.

THOMAS: I'm thinking these are by WMF, WMF is a German art nouveau producer, and the price, they're beautiful.

Right, I'm gonna carry on in here, if that's alright.

VO: I think I can hear the cogs turning in Thomas' mind.

Could we be looking at a potential bulk buy for a bumper auction lot here?

I've just been in the cabinet and pulled out a load of stuff.

It's the way to do it.

Corkscrew.

Propelling pencil and a knackered pair of tongs.

VO: Thomas, are you sure you've given this enough thought?

We're at £145 for all these items, and... Now, what've you found?

I spotted that just hanging there.

And I'm quite pleased I found that.

This is David Anderson.

David Anderson is a silversmith, this is a brooch and pendant, which is quite nice.

1970s, just a very lovely thing, and very fashionable right now.

VO: OK, so all these items now add up to £239.

Luckily, Elizabeth has worked her magic and the dealer has come down to £176.

VO: So, oh dear!

I think I know what that look means.

Well, do you think... ELIZABETH: I know what you're going to say, another phone call?

Well, yeah, just one more.

I'll buy the whole lot for a flat figure.

Right.

Now do you think 150 would be too cheeky?

VO: Quite possibly.

176?

Well, she's given you quite a big...

I know, I know, but I can only ask.

We can ask, we'll see.

Is that alright?

We might meet somewhere half way.

We'll give it a go.

Hello, Frances... You're not entirely surprised to hear from me again, are you?

No, well you've been extremely generous so far... THOMAS: Very generous.

..such a generous lady.

ELIZABETH: This lot, right, adds up to, the whole lot adds up to 176.

Can we do it for 150?

She's putting her glasses on, that's a good sign.

Oh, good.

No, she says it's not good.

Oh no.

No.

ELIZABETH: She'll do it for 160.

THOMAS: Meet her half way, 155.

15... 160, yes, you've bled her dry.

But not at 155?

ELIZABETH: No, can't be 155, gotta be 160.

Cuz she doesn't actually think she's making any profit on it.

And that is kind of why she's doing it, you know.

Yeah, deal, deal.

Lovely, thank you.

Really pleased, really really pleased.

VO: Well done Thomas, you're finally back the game.

I was worried about you for a while there.

Less of concern is the now well-stocked Paul Laidlaw.

Content with his purchases, he's allowed himself a little romantic assignment.

Ooh-ar.

VO: In Chawton lies the former home of one of England's foremost ladies of letters.

Louise is here to show Paul around the wonderful Jane Austen House Museum.

VO: Set amongst the landed gentry, Jane Austen's many finely-crafted novels made her one of the widest read English writers in the world - her work still loved today.

PAUL: A place of pilgrimage I've no doubt.

LOUISE: Yeah, definitely.

VO: Jane moved to Chawton at the age of 33, finding both a new home and a creative Eden.

But not, necessarily, finding happiness.

OK, Paul.

I can guess... What can you guess?

You tell me what you can guess.

Inkpot, quill table, mm... Yeah, you're probably right.

Tell me more.

This is the table at which Jane sat and revised her earlier novels, including Sense and Sensibility, and wrote entirely three others; Emma, Mansfield Park, and Persuasion.

And she sat here because she could hide herself away, in a way.

She was a very private person and she didn't want... like a lot of creative people, they don't want other people giving them ideas and suggestions.

Why did she not marry, do we know?

Well, money has a lot to do with it, and that is reflected very much in her writing, there's an awful lot of preoccupation with money in her writing, but I think had the right man presented himself, you know, had Mr Darcy walked through the door, or, you know, better yet, I don't know, Captain Wentworth - I'm gonna get carried away now - I think she would have been persuaded to marry, but you know, it didn't happen, and for us, I think we have to be grateful because had she married, I'm sure we wouldn't have these books now.

Indeed.

VO: Her much loved novels were nearly all written right here.

At this small table she was able to write not just beautifully, but continuously.

LOUISE: It's just extraordinary, the literary output in such a short time.

I mean, it's almost unprecedented, really, and so we do feel we're one of the most important and significant literary shrines in the world, actually, that so much work was done here in such a short space of time, she was a novel a year, really, which is staggering, yeah.

VO: You have to wonder if she actually left the chair.

Jane's first novel was published in 1811 under the pseudonym A Lady.

This was a convention at the time and allowed Jane to preserve her anonymity.

PAUL: Ah well, no prizes for guessing, a first edition in publisher's boards.

First edition of her first published novel, Sense And Sensibility.

PAUL: How is it received?

Don't forget that the reading public are pretty small, so you're talking about hundreds of copies, not thousands.

But it was well received.

The best received I think I would probably say was Pride and Prejudice, people really liked it straight away, which was great.

VO: Despite being a lady of the time, Jane Austen's novels became hugely popular and are still loved throughout the world.

Today, I think she may just have gained a new admirer!

VO: From Hungerford, Thomas is driving 35 miles south to Winchester and as the final auction draws ever closer, the pressure is definitely building.

THOMAS: My shop closes in three quarters of an hour, and I'm racing to get to Winchester, time is against me.

I feel I have the devil chasing me on my back.

VO: The building of Winchester Cathedral started in 1079, and it's the city's most imposing and loved landmark.

The interior doubled for the Vatican in the 2005 film of The Da Vinci Code, although meetings were subsequently held there to debunk the book.

VO: I don't mean to scare you, Thomas, but with only £48.54 in your pocket and a difference of over £150 to make up, this is the last chance saloon!

VO: It's getting pretty late to find enough antiques for auction, Thomas, so get in that shop.

Can I have a look at the long horn spoon, please?

It has to be right at the front, doesn't it?

THOMAS: It's a love spoon, it's got a little heart on it.

It's very sweet.

THOMAS: What's the very, very best on the spoon?

What have I got on it?

25?

Would you do 20?

VO: Why are we whispering?

Oh, you're beating me down.

Well, I'm only asking.

How about splitting in the middle?

Meeting you halfway.

So what would that mean?

22?

DEALER: Mm.

Yeah, OK. £22.

VO: Interesting technique, Thomas, both quietly subdued and decidedly insistent.

I like it - now, what's next?

DEALER: Cameo.

I haven't had one of these for a long time.

That's quite fun.

That's quite a nice cameo, isn't it?

VO: Oh, a pretty cameo brooch.

How very you, Thomas!

THOMAS: What's your very best on that one there?

DEALER: What are you gonna offer me?

Well, not very much, cuz I haven't got very much left.

I had 45 on it.

It's quite pretty, it's a lovely cameo.

DEALER: I've got to take 30, I'm sorry, but that's the best I can do.

THOMAS: No, that's fine.

THOMAS: I'm not disappointed that you've got to stick at 30, that's fine.

VO: Not much!

Well, you may seem a little disappointed.

And quiet.

Again.

Hm.

Just thinking in my head.

VO: Makes a change.

Come on, Thomas, we're fast approaching closing time.

THOMAS: If I make you an offer...

Yes, do that.

THOMAS: If you're really kind... DEALER: Yes.

VO: Go on then.

THOMAS: If you're really nice to me... VO: Yes?

THOMAS: Would you do that at £26?

Yes.

THOMAS: Would you?

I will.

I will, yes.

THOMAS: That's my last throw of the dice.

VO: At long last, Thomas finishes his shopping with just 54p left in his pocket.

VO: Now it's time gentlemen, please - time to reveal your new-found treasures.

I can see what you've bought, come on, show me, let's have a look at it.

Yeah, it's a brooch.

I can see it's a very big brooch for a giant.

Oh, that's lovely.

PAUL: It's alright, isn't it?

It's great.

What did you pay for it?

Two.

£200?

PAUL: Yeah.

Oh, you've really stuck your neck out there, Laidlaw.

VO: And what about your twin vases?

I like them.

THOMAS: They're sweet, aren't they?

They're sweet, you took the word out of my mouth.

THOMAS: They're chipped.

Are they?

Yeah, they're chipped.

PAUL: Oh, Tom THOMAS: A little bit.

Tell me you got those very, very reasonably indeed.

12.

Yeah, OK. THOMAS: Somebody might not see that they're chipped and just buy them.

Well, if they can't see the chips, maybe they need a pair of them.

THOMAS: Oh.

A pair of spectacles.

Aren't they sweet?

VO: Very sweet, Paul, and now it's Thomas's Bohemian vase.

Vases R Us!

But I promise you, that's the only one, though.

PAUL: It's alright.

THOMAS: It's not your thing.

PAUL: It's not stand out, but it is what it is, and it could make eyes at people.

VO: Time for Paul's quirky pipe!

THOMAS: Wonderful.

So what did you pay?

That's lovely.

VO: What will Paul make of the bundle of white metal items?

£80, 100?

90.

It's in with a shout, it's in with a shout.

VO: Now for Paul's magic lantern.

We sell them all the time, so do you.

They're quite good things, sort of £80-120.

VO: Thomas' two brooches.

David Anderson.

PAUL: Yeah, very stylish, I like that.

THOMAS: Very hot property.

PAUL: Aye, that's a good thing.

THOMAS: And I got that.

PAUL: Oh, I like those.

I like those very much.

My turn?

This is me on the way out.

This is the final throw of the die.

PAUL: Yeah.

Get my six gun out.

THOMAS: There you are, well done, sir.

What do they make?

£50-80.

PAUL: I wish I could get your estimates in the sale, Thomas!

Because I think it's worth 30-50, but I paid 29, so what does it matter?

VO: Come on Thomas, show him your spoon.

PAUL: OK, it is charming, utterly charming.

THOMAS: It is just charming.

PAUL: Gonna sell on merit, and that's a good thing.

A love spoon.

Because I love you.

VO: For now, maybe.

But the gloves will soon be off, so tell us what you really think.

My favorite item for Paul's, my favorite item's got to be the clock, it's a lovely looking clock.

The least favorite item I don't like is the magic lantern slides, they're so difficult to sell.

I like some of Tom's purchases, the two brooches, could double his money there.

The mixed lot, frankly, it's a lot of rubbish.

My biggest fear is coming out with less money than I started with, if that happens, I'm just gonna be gutted.

VO: So it's tissues at the ready as we hit the road one last time.

VO: It's been an eventful final leg from Tetsworth, via Lechlade, Hungerford, Basingstoke, Chawton and Winchester with the grand finale in Pewsey firmly in sight.

VO: The Jubilee auction rooms are the last port of call for our nervous pair, and auctioneer David Harrison has a few wise words to say about our experts' choices.

DAVID: I think there's an interesting, varied selection.

DAVID: I think the clock is going to be the interesting one, and I do honestly think the brooch should sell well.

DAVID: I think out of the two of them, I think Thomas stands the better chance, but we'll wait and see.

VO: Paul began his last trip with £360.68 and spent an impressive £299 on five auction lots.

VO: As for Thomas, well, he started way down on £208.54 and eventually bought six lots for £208.

He has just 54p left rattling around in his pocket.

VO: It's been a week of surprising auctions, with a rum mix of catastrophe and triumph.

Hopefully our boys can finish with a flourish, but frankly Thomas needs a miracle.

VO: And his cameo brooch is first up.

Straight in, £30 here.

20.

10?

Anyone like it?

THOMAS: No.

DAVID: Obviously not.

Right, we'll pass that by.

DAVID: No one wants to bid.

We will pass that by.

Don't know what happens now.

Nobody wanted it.

VO: Oh dear, Thomas, you'll just have to take it home.

Fingers crossed for your next brooch.

DAVID: It's a David Anderson, sweet little thing, straight in, £40 for this.

DAVID: 20 I'm bid, 20 I've got, £20, and two, thank you.

22, 22, 24, 26, 28, and 30.

Bid on the book.

DAVID: 35, 35, I'm out at £35 then, selling at 38 outside now, 40 sir, 40.

42.

45.

48.

50.

DAVID: And five, Ma'am?

Down here at 50.

THOMAS: £50.

PAUL: Oh, profit.

VO: That's more like it, Thomas.

Fingers crossed for a fightback.

What did you pay for that?

29, I paid.

Get in!

VO: Now, first on the nose for Paul are the Victorian spectacles.

DAVID: 10, then.

10, thank you, sir, you're all heart, 10, at 10, £10, thank you ma'am.

DAVID: 12.

14.

There we are, 16, 18.

DAVID: 20 and two, 22.

It's what we said they'd make.

..estimate, isn't it?

DAVID: Bid's in the doorway.

THOMAS: It's what I said.

Well done, a little bit of profit there for you.

VO: A reasonable profit there - and nothing to be sniffed at, unlike Paul's Georgian snuff box.

He haggled hard - let's hope it was worth the effort!

I've got interest, £20 I'm bid.

20.

At £20, 22, 25, 28 and 30.

DAVID: 32, sir.

32.

35.

At 35.

It's exactly what I said.

Are you leaving bids on my stuff?

THOMAS: Yeah.

PAUL: Oh, cheers mate.

Fine.

38, 40, carrying on.

DAVID: 45.

48.

A good result.

It's gonna make my estimate, 55.

At £55 then, I'm selling at 55.

Commission bid.

THOMAS: £55, well done you!

VO: That's more like it - well done Paul!

Now, will Thomas's love spoon send him head over heels?

THOMAS: Here we are.

Nice.

It looks nice from here, charming.

DAVID: Where are we going, £50?

30.

DAVID: 20 I've got against you all at £20.

Go on.

DAVID: 24.

26.

28.

PAUL: You're on the money.

THOMAS: 28.

At 28, at 28.

Go on, a bit more.

DAVID: At 28, against you all then I'm going to sell... Any advance, go on.

No, 28.

PAUL: Tiny little sweat on there when it started to happen, but... Yeah, I got a bit of a sweat on.

VO: Oh dear - after commission, that £6 ain't going far!

Next up is Paul's novelty pipe - but will it blow the bidders away?

Here we are.

What's that worth, chaps?

£100 for it.

DAVID: No?

50.

30, there you are.

DAVID: 30 I'm bid then at £30.

At 30, 32 commission, 35, 38, 40.

At 40, 42, 45, 48.

Well done, Laidlaw.

Nice thing.

At 50... five.

60.

At 60.

Well done.

At £60 then, nice thing.

All done at 60.

Get in!

VO: Fantastic result, Paul!

Next up is Thomas's mixed lot of white metal items - that's "not silver" to you and me.

Oh here we are, this is it.

£100.

50 to start, thank you very much indeed.

50 bid, at 50, good job lot.

Go on.

DAVID: 60... Five.

70.

DAVID: £70.

At £70.

THOMAS: More.

Here to be sold at 70.

Thank you, sir.

It was enough.

Alright.

VO: Oh dear Thomas.

Oh dear, oh dear.

Feel free to bid any time!

VO: Now, can Paul conjure up a profit on the magic lantern?

Philip, £20 I'm bid, 20, at £20 got, at 20.

At 20.

That is ridiculous.

Have we got another bidder?

25.

28.

And 30.

32.

DAVID: And five.

And eight.

At 38.

That's cheap, dirt cheap.

DAVID: At £38.

PAUL: Oh no!

See, I said it would make 35.

VO: Oh dear, the bidders liked that one, Paul.

But not a lot!

OK, fair enough.

VO: Cheer up Paul - at least it sold!

VO: Thomas, it's time for your art nouveau vase!

DAVID: Bohemian iridescent green glass vase, there's a really nice vase there.

Well sir, £50 away.

30 then.

Go on!

30 I've got, thank you, 30 bid, 30 at £30.

DAVID: At 30.

32, sir.

32, 32, 35.

And eight.

38.

Go on, a bit more, a bit more.

At £38, doesn't seem expensive.

No, one more.

Go on, go on.

DAVID: 1228.

PAUL: What did you pay for that?

29.

Fair enough, that's alright.

VO: At least it's a profit, and surely your twin handled vases will help you end on a high.

Who likes them?

10's a voice outside, at £10, at £10.

DAVID: At 10 only, at 10, I'll take 12 now.

At £10.

DAVID: 12, thank you.

At 12, 14 now here.

16 outside.

18 outside.

New place, yes.

DAVID: Lady's bid, 24, sir, 24.

And six ma'am?

26.

28.

30.

32, sir, 32.

No more.

35.

35.

In the doorway now.

THOMAS: £35.

DAVID: At £35.

Go on.

DAVID: That was hard work.

Yes!

VO: There you go - what did I tell you?

Now for Paul's final lot of the week and his biggest gamble so far.

The hour of reckoning is upon us!

Tick tock.

£100 I am bid, 100 I've got.

£100, and 10 sir, 120.

DAVID: 130, 140 commission.

150, 160.

170, 180.

DAVID: 190, I'm out.

Bid's in the doorway, £190.

DAVID: 200... and 10.

220.

230.

240.

250.

260.

270.

280.

290.

DAVID: 300.

20 sir?

320.

340.

360.

380.

And he's gone.

At 380, bid's on the telephone.

At £380 then, I'm selling it at 380 on the telephone.

THOMAS: Well done.

PAUL: Thanks, my man.

You've beaten me hands down.

VO: With a profit of 180 - I think you've just hit the bullseye!

You and I desperately deserve a pint and a hug.

VO: Oh dear, no, please, no hugging.

The pint, I'll take!

But you a pint.

VO: A very wise choice indeed.

Now, what about a recap?

VO: Thomas started the show with just £208.54 and went on to lose even more.

After paying auction costs, he ends his road trip with just £181.76.

No pocket money for you, Thomas.

VO: Paul meanwhile started this leg with a comfortable lead at £360.68.

He made some clever purchases and some very healthy profits, ending the week triumphant on £516.78.

Gold star for you, Paul!

That's it.

I feel thrashed.

THOMAS: You've utterly annihilated me.

I felt I had six of the best off Laidlaw.

Anyway, well done.

Thanks very much, Thomas.

It was a pleasure, you're not getting away without one.

VO: Aww, I love a happy ending!

VO: It's been an emotional week for both fellows.

Since leaving Skipton, Thomas and Paul have driven over 300 miles down the backbone of Britain.

And there's been fighting talk from the start.

Are you feeling lucky, punk?

VO: They both wanted victory - at any cost.

Rob him for his money.

Hand over your money, sir.

VO: Thomas decided that to get ahead, he had to get a hat.

VO: But unfortunately it didn't quite go to plan.

THOMAS: Oh, my hat's gone!

AUCTIONEER: £30 online, £30 bid now, five online also... MUSIC: "Time With You" by Marc Robillard PAUL: A hug?

THOMAS: No.

You want a hug.

THOMAS: No.

PAUL: Later.

No hugs later.

Nothing.

VO: What started with war...

I'll always have a hug for you.

VO: ..ended with a whole lot of love.

Honey!

I'm home!

Have you got a feel for me?

Cuz I love you.

# And it's all I can do # I wish my days away... # VO: Now that's enough of that.

Let's not forget our little Italian masterpiece here, eh?

She's been beautiful.

THOMAS: You could now afford to buy this with all your profits!

VO: Next week we're on the road with two cheeky chappies - Charlie Ross and Charles Hanson - as they travel from Bridlington to Rye on their quest for weird and wonderful antiques.

VO: And throughout their journey, the pair remain upbeat and chipper.

CHARLIE: You're just too good for me.

CHARLES: I'm not.

BOTH: # You're just too good to be true # Can't take my eyes off of you... # subtitling@stv.tv