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I met this girl Rosanna at school. She's about 16, 17 maybe. But she's a nice girl, real nice. I don't have any classes with her, but I ride the van with her, and due to the seating arrangements I'm in the back with her.

I pick on her sometimes just to let her know that I'm still somebody to joke with. Every time she gets angry, I'll cheer her up.

She's like me in a way, but she expresses her feelings more. Me, on the other hand, I keep everything bottled up. She just lets it all out. She doesn't like this person, she'll tell 'em. She likes 'em, she'll tell 'em. That's what I find so amazing about her.

I think Rosanna's very pretty, but the fact of the matter is I never really went well with the dating process. I've never actually asked a girl or anything like that. About all I usually do is become friends with 'em cause I don't have the balls or anything to tell a girl. It's happened before, I've screwed up and they've wound up finding someone else. Whoop dee doo, I can't do anything about it, I just say I'm happy for 'em.

I told my mother last night. She said, "Are you going out on a date with her?" I said I don't know. And she said, "I hope it's much more than a friendship outing, cause I've seen enough of those." She actually wants me to find somebody.

I am nervous about meeting her -- what to say to her, how to act around her, everything. Because I haven't exactly been on a real date before, and I don't even know if this is a real date because I didn't ask.

Chris and Rosanna

If I'm dating her, holding her hand would be fine. But if we're just friends, I don't know what. So if hold her hand I could be actually doing something wrong. I could get her angry, upset, anything -- I don't know, and that's why I'm nervous.

I've never been on a real date because, if you noticed yourself, in Garrett there isn't many women that are quote, my type. But Rosanna, God, she's exactly my type. She's easy to talk to. You don't have to fear being around her. The whole nine yards.

I'm comfortable around Rosanna as a friend because I'm used to that -- I've been friends with girls a long time. But everyone I've ever had passionate interest in, I've always had a fowl up.

I couldn't get further than friend because I was afraid to. I was afraid if I tried to tell her how I truly felt, she would be appalled or sickened by it and stop being my friend. So I never took the chance.

I've never really had a father tell me about these things. All I've ever known is keep quiet, don't say anything. I don't know what to do in this matter.

My only problem is, can I tell her? I don't know if I have the bravery or the strength to tell her that I like her, that I'd like to see her on more boyfriend-girlfriend terms. I don't know how to tell her, and even if I did, I'd probably be to afraid to. …

With Rosanna, I think it all started when I asked her, "Would you like to go out with me?"

She stopped speaking to me. Hell, you guys were filming the very day that happened. I just popped up nice, I mean, what's a simple question? And, I thought I took it rather well. As soon as she said "No," I didn't cuss her out. Hell, all I did was, "Okay. That's cool. You can't blame a guy for tryin'." But she got mad at me. I still don't know why. I won't fight with her, I don't yell at her, I don't do nothing.

When I ride in the van to school -- or back, it doesn't matter -- she doesn't talk to me. So I just don't talk to her. That entire van trip home that day, she didn't talk to me until the very last bit of it. We were gettin' out of the van and she says, "Are they done [filming] for today?" And, I answered honestly, I said, " Yeah they're done. They'll probably ask you to get out and take the mic off and stuff." And she says "Okay." You see, I don't care. If she wants to talk to me, I'm gonna talk to her.

I don't know what I did to offend her. I don't know why she's even angry at me. I've seen a lot of them boys down there just walk up to her and say, "Uh, you wanna go out?" And, she'll just say "No." And then they wind up talking, rest of the day. Me, she doesn't even wanna look at me.

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posted jan. 9, 2006

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