The Morning After

by Damon Gambuto     Department: Correlations

So last night WIRED Science had its wrap party and, from what I'm told, I was in attendance.   You see, the night is a little fuzzy in my memory.  To be honest, the world is a little fuzzy today.  I am nursing a hangover that I could sell to science.  It's got me thinking - what exactly is a hangover?

Chances are you've had a hangover too.  Don't worry, I'm not here to judge, I'm here to explain.  You already know what it feels like: the nausea, the headaches. . . the self-loathing that arrives the morning after attending a work function and ordering one (or four) too many vodkas.  Okay, maybe the last part just refers to my Wednesday night (apologies to WiSci folks who had to listen to my drunken ramblings).  

Okay, back to my hungover ramblings.  

The medical name for the condition is "veisalgia," from the Norwegian word "kveis" meaning "uneasiness following debauchery" and the Greek word "algia" which means "pain."  Okay, pretty good word origin.  Now let's look at the biology behind all that uneasiness and pain.

The first culprit is vasopressin inhibition.  Alcohol in the bloodstream causes the pituitary gland to shut down vasopressin production.  In the absence of this hormone our bodies give water an express ticket from our kidneys to our bladders.  Perhaps you're familiar with the noticeable increase in frequency of your bathroom breaks when you're drinking a bit too much.  This diuretic effect means - that's right - dehydration. Hangover cottonmouth?  That's your body telling you to drink some damn water already.  That screaming headache?  That's your brain shrinking.  Literally.  All of those thirsty vital organs in your body steal water from your brain which causes it shrink a bit.  This leads to pressure on connective tissue in the skull which leads to your saying things like "Stop yelling at me" when your friends say insensitive things like "Good morning!"   

You've also been expelling sodium and potassium which can lead to more headaches and my least favorite feeling in the world: nausea.

There's also some stuff in alcohol called congeners (a byproduct of the fermentation process).  They are found in greater concentration in dark alcohols.  You see, it wasn't just that the wine was cheap, but also that it was red.  This is the stuff that the commercial hangover remedies are targeting.  They claim that if you take their pill before you start drinking, you'll absorb less of the congener content.  Remind me to take a hard look at myself if I start planning my evenings around drinking too much.  

Next up, your liver.   Alcohol metabolism produces a toxic substance called acetaldehyde.  It's created in your liver when alcohol is broken down by the enzyme alcohol dehydrogenase.  Yet another enzyme, acetaldehyde dehydrogenase, teams up with another substance know as glutathione to turn that acetaldehyde into the nontoxic substance acetate.  This process works great until someone starts yelling, "Chug, chug, chug!"   When your system is flooded with alcohol, your liver can't keep up and that yucky acetaldehyde takes up residence in your body and does its level best to keep you from being a productive human being the next day.  

There's one more part worth talking about and that's glutamine rebound.  Glutamine is a natural stimulant whose production is suppressed when drinking.  When you stop drinking (that is to say, when you pass out still wearing your designer frock or pantsuit) your body starts pumping you full of glutamine which means restless sleep.  Sound familiar?  When the glutamine rebound is severe it can cause tremors, anxiety and all those fun, jittery feelings that won't let you forget that you've forgotten most of your previous night's escapades.

There's even more to tell, but this is going to have to suffice as our hangover primer.  I'm going back to bed.

Tags: hangover, wrap party