What Females Want
Jumping Spiders Photo Caption Challenge

Lisa Taylor, of the Arizona State University Life Sciences Department, found these two jumping spiders of the genus Paraphidippus in Costa Rica. The male (on the right) is guarding the female. The males of this species have larger chelicerae (jaws) than the females, and these jaws may be used for fighting with other males over access to females.

Read submitted captions — or submit your own!


“Yes, it is I, ma’lady, your knight in shining exoskeleton.”
– Jeremy Towne, Indianapolis, IN

“Let’s do it on the fly.”
– Clyde, Old Shop, NL, Canada

“Barbara takes proactive measures to stop Joe’s midnight larder raids.”
– Glover, Baltimore, MD

“Wanna hang out?”
– Daci, NC

“I told you I would pay for the designer wedding dress… but no, you had to go and do it yourself!”
– Ben Campos, Fresno, CA

“The first time our ocelli met, my jointed appendages went weak, my exoskeleton tinkled, and my chelicerae dropped to the floor!”
– Molly Grossman, LaGrange, IN

“Shall we go to my web or your web or each go home alone?”
– Daniel, New York, NY

“Prisoner of Love”
– Donna Sobczak, Arlington, TN

“My nine eyes adore you!”
– Dale Marsden, McFarland, WI

“Oh honey, I love it when you tie me up!”
– Diane, Tempe, AZ

“Please wake up, Suzie. It’s time to go visit Miss Muffett.”
– Joyce Cope, Ormond Beach, FL

“Nice legs!”
– Liz Greenbaum, New York, NY

“Hey, you said you were just going to carry me over the threshold.”
– Dan, Washington, DC

“Don’t do that in front of the web cam!”
– Sean O’Shea, Brooklyn, NY

“What a tangled web of love we weave.”
– Donald Lee, Brooklyn, NY


Send us yours in the comments field below.

  • Danielle

    Why, yes. These chelicerae are real!

  • Jayson R. Biadog

    Come on Dear, Spiderman will surely take care of spiderwoman.

  • alex camu

    Ohhh…..excuse me, I didn’t see ya there !!!……hmmm, you come here often ?????

  • Robyn

    My Preciousssssssssssss

  • Stephanie Suesan Smith, Ph.D.

    I told you you would get stuck, but no-o-o, you just had to try anyway.

  • heartsabustin

    Hellllooooo, Clarice……

  • Mary

    “I’ve got my eyes on you!”

  • Mary Jo

    He says nothing, but the lights dim and Barry White is playing in the background.

  • alcush

    The male of this species, like many of the human species, performed a deft maneuver the first night spent with his mate; he farted and pulled the covers over her head.

  • Rhonda Price

    “The sooner I can rip through this wedding veil, the sooner we can start the honeymoon!”



  • Heather Martin

    Aaah. A nice soft bed, a man to rub your back…could a girl ask for much more?

  • Vera Wimmer

    Darn! 4 pairs of eyes and I still can’t focus very well, but what I see I have to say, ” Darling, you look Mauvalous!!”

  • dave hernandez

    Goodnight Sweetheart! Sleep tight!

  • Neal

    This happy couple met on a singles website.

  • mamanomnom

    Would you like to bear several thousand of my children?

  • Lori Reed

    She: “Oh, come on, George! I said you had a big head, but I meant it as a compliment! Please let me out!”

  • Lori Reed

    She: “I am not coming out until you say you’re sorry, and that’s final!”

  • Jody Gangloff-Kaufmann

    Ehh? What do you think about THESE chelicerae? Pretty hot huh?

  • Rachel Jackson

    You’ve got a front row ticket to my gun show, good thing you have eight eyes, your going to need them

  • Brad

    What’s the matter babe? You look pale.

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